
I so wish I had one of these as a child. Along with a remote control helicopter and one of those miniature Mercedes SL roadsters and a set of x-ray specs. To be without these things as a child was to feel deprived.
As an only child I was often accused of being "spoilt". Hearing my mum say I was spoilt was as much a part of my childhood as hearing that "money doesn't grow on trees", that I was "only showing off", "shouldn't answer back" and was "just overtired". A staple of my parents' predictable repartee.
For me it's interesting to note that in our society spoiling our children is sometimes considered to be as big a faux pas as depriving them.
My dictionary defines spoiling as "harming the character of a child by
being too lenient or indulgent" or "to treat with great or excessive
kindness, consideration or generosity".
What I think we largely mean when we talk about spoiling our children is being too generous and giving our children whatever they want, whether that be material possessions, the ice cream they want or another go on their PS3.
As Adam Smith said in The Wealth of Nations, "the real price of everything, what everything really costs
to the man who wants to acquire it, is the toil and trouble of acquiring it." In other words, if things come too easily to us we do not value them.
To paraphrase the title of a memorable psychology text, disappointment is important.
In our society, "spoilt brats" are the antipathy of good, well-behaved
children, and yet there is still clearly significant demand for luxury goods
for children. As parents we all walk a fine line between wanting to
give our children the best of everything and giving them what is best for
them.
But going back to that definition we clearly believe that there are limits to generosity, but is it really possible to be too kind? Can being the recipient of 'excessive kindness' as a child somehow teach us that love comes too easily?
Clearly some do believe that unconditional love is a poor foundation for life or we wouldn't talk so supportively about giving our children character-building experiences.
Are there possibly two discrete types of spoilt children then -- those that have been given too much and those that are loved too much?